Among reports filed with police:
5272 U.S. Highway 17: A couple had just dined at the Huddle House and were in their room at the Economy Inn after midnight. They were in bed when a wacko began banging on the room’s window and demanding entrance. He claimed loudly from outside that they owned him money. The guy inside assured the nut-job that he had the wrong room and that the police were being called. This only further emboldened the man, who then broke through the glass window and tumbled inside the room. On their way out the room’s door, the couple noticed that the man had already managed to rise and stand after such a foolish stunt. However, the kook did not stick around for the cops, who are looking for him still.
1101 Gloucester St.: Police were called to The Well because of reports from passing motorists that folks were jumping out into the traffic on this busy thoroughfare. Maybe because they were “fighting, intoxicated and screaming at each other,” which is what the responding cops had to deal with. “Officers tried to deescalate the situation, but three of the subjects would not comply,” the report said. Police put those three in jail, charged with disorderly conduct.
1400 block of P Street: A jerk socked his girlfriend in the eye, then skulked away before the cops got there. That’s OK, they know who he is and a warrant is going out for his arrest.
— Larry Hobbs