Among reports filed with police:
3241 U.S. Highway 341: A man made a supreme nuisance of himself, refusing to leave his room, room 272, at the Budget Motel. By the time the cops got there, the simmering squatter had made a hasty exit to the woods, gun in hand, another motel resident reported. Police tracked him down in the the above-referenced woods. He went to jail on an outstanding warrant for burglary, possession of drugs and possession of funny money.
Walker Road and Golden Isles Parkway: A dude drove a black Lexus LS400 into the rear end of another vehicle, then drove away. The victim got the vehicle’s license plate number, and a fellow motorist followed the fink to an address in Northwood Estates. The Lexus was uninsured. The man went to jail for fleeing the scene of the crash and driving an uninsured vehicle.
5252 U.S. Highway 341: A guy was having a hard time with his suddenly ex-roommates at a room at the Rodeway Inn. He just wanted his stuff from inside the room, the guy told responding police. Unfortunately, a quick background check revealed that the hard-luck drifter was wanted on an outstanding felony warrant for violation of probation.
2300 Amherst Street: Verbatim from police logs: “Officer mediated disturbance between a male and a female. Food stamp card was returned to male.”
— Larry Hobbs